Whore
by Hovinarri
Summary: Another Friday night, another one-night stand. But when he picked up this attractive blonde whore, Sasori just might have got a little more than what he bargained for... SasoDei AU one-shot, lemon


Eep.

I-I-I was supposed to write something else completely, b-b-but I listened to Dirty Dancer by Usher and Enrique Iglesias, and...!  
>A demonic plot bunny attacked me!<br>It was like "Write a SasoDei lemon or else-!" I shivered, "Or else what...?" "Or else your inspiration will be forever lost!"  
>I obliged, but when I was done, the demonic plot bunny told me I had to get this up! *sob* OR ELSE!<p>

To anyone wondering, no I'm not leaving Yu-Gi-Oh behind. Just wanted to... Try something else and stuff...

Anyways. Hello everyone in the Naruto fandom. *awkward laughter* Name's Tiikerikissa, and umm...  
>My first Naruto story... First lemon too. *nervous glance around*<p>

Oh, and I cracked 5K words with this! LET'S CELE-B-R-A-T-E! :D

So, shipping's SasoDei, with mentions of KakuHida,

**Warnings:** Afore-mentioned sexual content, so ummm, _man on man sex_. And swearing. And... Not much else, I hope. Gay relationships? Yes. OOCness? Of course I aimed not to do this, but be warned either way...  
><strong>Disclaimer:<strong> I don't own the characters mentioned. The plot is mine though, and if it resembles anything you've seen/read/experienced before, it's pure coincidence.

* * *

><p>Sasori hated bars.<p>

To him, they were noisy, dirty, and plain _disgusting, _for a lack of a more grossed-out adjective.

Had he been still sober, he would have left already. He would have left long ago without a second glance at the gross place, only happy to be able to get as far from there as possible.

But being as drunk as he was, Sasori was currently occupying one of the worn-out bar stools, looking around for someone to hit on. Hit, seduce, fuck, the whole set, in his mind dubbed as 'Semi-rare Friday night fun'.

He would even take a _guy_ in his hammered state, which was rare for him, because even though he was a bi, he did not want to risk the chance that some guy tried to fuck _him_. He would submit to _no one,_ and_ never_. It was simply out of question.

He didn't have to wait for long before an attractive blonde sat down on the stool a few away from him. Despite his long hair, tied in a high ponytail with a fringe hiding his left eye, Sasori thought he had to be male, if the way he didn't even bother looking around if he could get any here, just wanting to get drunk, was any indication. No girl did that, they always got all flirty and tried to find themselves their fairytale prince...

Perfect.

"Why _hello_~" Sasori purred seductively, moving to the stool next to the blonde.

Not even looking at him, focused on getting his drink instead, he rejected Sasori. "Not gay, un."

Sasori couldn't help but squeal on the inside at the sound of that voice. It wasn't exactly manly, not girlish, but it was somewhat_ cute_. And somewhere on the back of his mind, Sasori knew that this specific word implied that he had already drunk one too much. "Me neither, but I do know a good fuck when I see one," Sasori murmured endeavouringly, "I bet you do too..."

This managed to get him a bored look-over from the slightly annoyed blonde, "How long have you been deprived of sex when you get that desperate, un?"

"Not too long, but I'm too drunk to let a pretty ass just go by without having it."

"Ah, so you're not like this when you're sober, un?"

"Do you want to find out?"

"...no." He took a sip of his drink, ignoring Sasori yet again. He did the ignoring so professionally that Sasori almost wanted to suggest a new career for him, but knew it would make him seem _even weirder_ and _even more hammered_.

"What's your name?" Sasori asked suddenly. It wasn't as if he needed to know it, but he thought it would be quite a turn on to have the blonde moaning his in pure ecstasy.

"Deidara, un."

"Dei-da-ra?" Sasori purred slowly, stretching each syllable, "I like the sound of that. I'm Sasori."

"Sasori, un?" he repeated, like the name was actually a little too hard for him to get it right.

"Yes. Want to play with me, Deidara?" And of course, no one would ever say no when he asked this. And Deidara was no exception to this rule

After getting Deidara a few drinks, the blonde was getting drunk enough. Enough in Sasori's mind being so drunk that he knew what was happening, but couldn't really reason anywhere beyond that.

"How old are you, _Danna_?"

Sasori rolled his eyes at the nickname, too hammered to really care. Besides, the way the blonde said it made it sound... Kind of sexy. It was like a pet name, but it was respectful. 'Master'. It also meant that the blonde might be more willing to submit to him than he first thought. "27."

"...no way, un..."

"Yes way. I think I would know. What about you?"

"...nineteen..." Deidara murmured, suddenly finding the patterns on the tabletop very interesting, tracing them with a lithe finger.

"Shit. You're just a brat after all..." Sasori slurred slightly, "Hey, what do you do for a living when you can aff-ford to drink so much?"

"...I live in a brothel, un. It gets me by."

It took Sasori's drunken mind a couple of moments to connect the somewhat old word with its appropriate meaning. "You're a whore?"

"...yeah. I hope you do realize that I would've never told you that if you hadn't got me so drunk, un," Deidara snorted, "It's not something I like telling random strangers on the street, y'know? 'Hey look, I'm a whore!' It's not something I'm proud of."

"Can imagine..." Sasori frowned, "I'm having second thoughts about all t'is, actually..."

"Wha?" he asked, blinking.

"I don't want to get infected with whatever you have."

Deidara let out a jaded, cold laughter, "Think I don't use protection whenever I do my thing, un? No girl wants to get knocked up by a _whore_." Sasori noticed the bitterness on the word 'whore' when Deidara used it, but didn't think much of it.

"Mmm, fair enough... Come on, let's go."

"Where?" to his defense, he did sound genuinely confused. Almost like he hadn't known where this was going all along. Ever since Sasori first purred his greeting, actually.

Rolling his eyes, Sasori clumsily stood up, grabbing Deidara's arm in advance, "My place, naturally. I don't want to fuck you _here_, after all." He motioned at the bar with his free hand to add to the point of 'here' being nowhere good enough for either of them.

Deidara shivered slightly under his touch, almost but not quite moving away from the sneaky fingers' reach. "Are you _still_going on about that, un?"

Sasori snorted, "Yes. Now follow, it's not far."

Drunk as he was, Deidara obeyed, giggling as he did, "Whatever you say, Danna~"

He soon found out that Sasori's place was just a plain normal little yellow house with a bedroom, kitchen, bathroom, living room and a guestroom.

"This isn't half bad..." Deidara murmured, "You don't have a roommate, do you?" He somehow seemed to understand that if Sasori's potentially existent roommate caught them in the act, it would be... Bad?

"Nope, so don't bother worrying about that," he replied as he tugged Deidara to the bedroom by his arm.

When Sasori started undressing Deidara, the blonde visibly tensed.

"What's the matter?" Sasori asked as he ridded his partner of his shirt, purring against his chest, "Is my little _whore_ not used to this after all?"

"...never been fucked before..." Deidara admitted, looking down at his toes like he expected him to laugh, which he did. Sasori laughed, only slightly sadistically, knowing he would have _fun _with this.

"Is that so? Then I'll make sure it won't hurt you... too much more than necessary..."

Deidara nodded hesitantly, taking off Sasori's jacket and his shirt, ever so slowly. After he did, he stopped momentarily, leaning to touch his fingers against Sasori's toned chest lightly. He acted almost like he thought that Sasori would break under his touch if he did something wrong.

Smirking at this, he went to work with Deidara's pants, wanting every garment of clothing gone as soon as possible before going to play with the blonde's body, before moving on to fully owning him in every way he could currently imagine.

The belt and the button were opened, the zipper was pulled down, and Sasori yanked them off the other with one hasty movement.

Deidara distracted Sasori from staring at his clothed manhood too long by pulling him down for a kiss. It started off sweet and caring, quickly turning into a passionate war of two tongues.

Sasori was the one to break the kiss, tired of waiting before he could see_ all_of his partner. He pulled Deidara's boxers off of him, grinning slightly at the sight of Deidara's erection. Before Deidara could try and get rid of his pants, Sasori brushed his fingers against the erect member, making the blonde moan and forget every thought that might have previously been in his head.

"Danna…!"

"You really are a whore..." Sasori hissed, his own mind growing hazy and his pants growing that much tighter at the sounds of the blonde's pleasured moans.

"It's not my fault that you make me this way..." Deidara whispered. Sasori wasn't sure if he meant to sound so seductive or not, but it wasn't like it even mattered much at that point either way.

Sasori moved the bite at the blonde's neck, making sure to leave a mark so that the blonde wouldn't be able to look at the mirror for a few days without blushing three different shades of red and proceeding to think of ways to hide the embarrassing love bite.

While he worked on this, Deidara moaned, his trembling hands slowly making their way to the red head's pants, taking them off along with his boxers carefully.

Sasori kicked them off the bed, not caring in the slightest where they were to land, and bowed his head to treat Deidara's nipples with his tongue.

Biting his lip to muffle any other embarrassing sounds of pleasure he was sure to make sooner or later, Deidara quivered under his touch.

"You're so boring, brat..." he murmured as he switched nipples, giving the other the same treatment.

"I-I-I-" Deidara stammered in response, not able to say anything even half coherent with the pleasure currently fogging his mind.

Sasori turned him on his back, towering over him and grabbing a bottle of lube from his nightstand.

Without any questions or a warning, Sasori coated three of his fingers with the lubricant and pressed two of them inside of Deidara.

The blonde whimpered, screwing his eyes shut in the clutches of this new, foreign pain as Sasori scissored the fingers inside of him.

"Never been fucked before, eh?" Sasori asked more or less conversationally as he added the third finger. "I'll make sure you'll never forget this time, then," he promised as he brushed his fingers against his prostate.

Deidara let out a loud moan before managing to concentrate enough to find his voice and shut up once again. If anyone were to ask Sasori, he would surely say that Deidara had quieted down way too early.

"Deidara..." Sasori growled disappointedly as he withdrew the fingers, guiding his erection to his entrance, "Don't be so difficult… Let me hear you."

"W-w-was that supposed to mean 'Are you ready'?" he asked, voice slightly quivering from pain, pleasure and anticipation.

"I'll take that as a yes," Sasori declared, pushing inside of him fully with one quick thrust. He lived by the saying 'What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger', at least when he was the one inflicting the pain and not receiving it.

Deidara whimpered, his eyes widening, and a silent tear quickly rolling down his cheek, leaving behind a wet trail. Of course it hurt him, but at this point he didn't want to display weakness, as he was already so vulnerable before the other to begin with.

"You're so fucking..." Sasori growled, thinking over how hard it was for him to not just go crazy and pound the younger male in the mattress. "Tight." He kissed the tear away, more or less patiently waiting for him get used to being penetrated like this.

It took Deidara a few minutes to adjust, before he nodded carefully, "Fuck me, Danna... Make me yours."

"So sentimental..." Sasori whispered before starting to thrust in and out of him, aimed to hit his prostrate every time.

Deidara finally let the carefully built walls of his crash, moaning and begging Sasori, telling him the dirtiest things he happened to have in mind, wrapping his legs around Sasori's waist to urge him further and deeper.

"Sasori… Ah, Danna!" he screeched, his mind only filled with the pleasure and… Well, he could've said it was love, but he would never admit to himself that he had fallen for someone who had picked him up from the bar as a one-night stand.

As he felt himself get closer to the edge, Sasori started stroking Deidara in time with his quick thrusts, wanting the other to go before himself. It was a matter of pride, for him.

With one loud cry of Sasori's name, Deidara spilled his seed all over their chests, covering them in one sticky mess.

The way the tight walls tightened around him, in turn, made Sasori groan, "Deidara..." and with that he claimed him in a way no one had ever claimed him before. He fell on top of Deidara, breathing heavily against his pale skin.

"I see that I was right about the good fuck..." Sasori grinned lopsidedly, too tired to move away or pull out of him just yet, savoring the closeness as long as the aftermath kept him high.

"You were good too, Danna, un..." Deidara murmured dazedly, the look in his eyes suggesting that he was somewhere else completely at the moment, "Really good..."

Pulling out of his new-made lover, and earning a satisfying whine from the blonde, Sasori laid next to him, "Thanks... Don't complain to me if you're all hungover and sore in the morning though..."

"Shit..." Deidara swore, clumsily standing up and getting dressed. "I have to go! I have work to do tomorrow!"

Sasori growled tiredly, not really certain how the blonde could even stand up properly, let alone get dressed that quickly. Must come with the job of a whore, he reasoned with himself uncertainly.

"I hope to see you around, Danna, un!" he called, followed by the loud bang of the front door.

Without bothering to move from the messy bed, Sasori only pulled the covers over himself, not wanting to end up getting sick because of this night. "Forget about him, Sasori. He'll never be yours, he's just a whore..." 

* * *

><p>The next morning, Deidara had an abrupt moment of 'What happened last night, I don't remember a thing?'. It only lasted for the approximately twenty-eight seconds before he finally tried standing up and stretching like he did every morning.<p>

Because when he did that (or tried to, at least), he immediately felt both nauseous and sore, grabbing the paper bag next to the bed he always slept on and throwing up everything inside of his stomach.

"Sleeping beauty is fucking back is business and not too beautiful, eh?" his co-worker asked, peeking his head through the door.

"Shut up, Hidan..." Deidara muttered weakly, massaging his temples carefully.

"Got some last night, did you not?" Hidan just never gave up. This was something the last few months had taught Deidara after they first met.

"None of your business, un..."

"Was she any good?"

Deidara flinched, not really a good liar (Not really even a moderate liar). "Umm..."

"No?" the albino blinked almost like it was impossible for a girl to actually be _bad_when it came down to sex.

"Yes, he was, un!" Deidara snapped at him, eyes widening in realization of what had escaped his mouth, slapping his hand over it. "I mean..."

Hidan laughed, "I never knew you fucking had it in you, Dei! Always claiming to be oh-so-straight!" He sat on the foot Deidara's bed, on top of the covers that had been kicked away hours before. "Were you on top?"

He scratched the back of his head, smiling sheepishly, "I..."

A sinister smile lightened his face at these words. "He fucked you! He really fucked you!"

"Hidan, quiet, un!" Deidara hissed, following his own advice, "No one needs to know that, un!"

"...do you like him?"

Sasori? Deidara thought back at the attractive male, purring his name. His red hair that pointed around carelessly, his chest that wasn't too muscular, just toned enough. His brown eyes, filled with lust, his slightly parted lips and-

He shook his head a no. "Nah, he was just a one-night stand from the bar, un. Even when he took me to his place, it was only a quick fuck."

"But you've never even fucking had sex besides work. Since when did you even fucking do one-night stands?"

"Well maybe I was the one-night stand, then!" Deidara snapped at him, sulking.

"That's too fucking bad," Hidan shrugged, scratching the back of his head uncertainly, "But if you really fucking like him, you should fucking go for it." Hidan paused momentarily, wanting to help his friend out a little more, "What his address?"

"...I don't know."

"But I thought you fucking were there?" Hidan snapped, then running a hand through his light hair as a mean of calming himself down. Getting mad at his friend would _not_help Deidara, not at all.

"I was drunk, un."

"Cell phone number?"

"...I don't know, un."

"I'm trying to fucking help you out here, Jashin-damnit!" Hidan swore, bringing up his own religion, where he worshipped a god by the name of Jashin. He liked to call himself a 'Jashinist', and had tried to convert Deidara to believe in Jashin also. "But you're not making it any fucking easier!"

"...sorry, un..."

"...Name?"

"Huh? Oh, Sasori, un."

"...Pein's buddy, Sasori? What the fuck? Red hair, brown eyes, shorter than you?"

"Who's Pein? And yup, yup, yup, un."

Hidan shrugged uninterestedly, "A friend of Kakuzu's. I've been out drinking with them a few times." Kakuzu was Hidan fuck-buddy (or boyfriend, though they would both deny this when someone asked either of them about it). "You fucking sure about him? He's trouble, I can tell."

"...I'm a whore..."

"What does that fucking have to do with anything?" Hidan asked more or less curiously.

"It has to do with that I can't judge anyone, un. I'm a whore."

"Stop saying that. You're not a whore." Hidan frowned; this was not good, not at all….

"A whore a whore a whore a whore a whore a whore a whore," Deidara chanted.

Hidan pressed his hand to Deidara's mouth. "You are not a whore."

Deidara bit the hand, hard enough to leave teeth marks. When Hidan pulled it away (with a pretty undignified squeak), he continued. "I'm a whore a whore a whore a whore a whore a whore a whore a whore a whore..."

"...did he fucking say that?"

"Mmm, a few times."

Hidan remembered the time a few months back when Deidara was new. He had a breakdown and he said that he wanted to die, calling himself all the names he could think of.

Even though that phase was over by now, Hidan still thought that Deidara might break down if he had to bear too much. And getting called a whore (a few times) by the one he seemed pretty much in love with most likely fell under the category of 'too much'.

"Hey, I'll fucking bet you five that he didn't mean it in a bad way."

Deidara looked up at him skeptically. "Not in a bad way? How can you mean 'whore' in a good way, un?"

"Whores are pretty good, I guess." Hidan shrugged lazily.

"Mmm." Deidara stood up, teetering slightly on his feet, almost falling over. "Shit..."

"You sure you can fucking work today? You seem pretty wasted."

"Yeah, it's not like I can afford missing a day, un," Deidara pressed his hand to the wall nearest to him, hoping to calm the spinning room.

"If you're so certain... I'll go tell boss that you're ready."

Deidara nodded, going to brush his hair and tying it in his signature ponytail (like the day before, when they met), thinking it would make him seem a little more decent, also a little less trashed. 

* * *

><p>Sasori buried his head under his pillow, hoping to drown all his thoughts. And if that was too much to ask, at least the ones starring a certain blonde.<p>

_"Fuck me, Danna... Make me yours."_

He groaned, throwing the good-for-nothing pillow away angrily. "Just forget about him!" he screeched, glaring at the pillow like it was the reason for all his problems.

When the pillow only laid on the floor, seeming perfectly comfortable with the current situation, Sasori sighed. Remembering that he had a puppet just waiting to be painted, he made his way to the 'art room', which also served as the guestroom. He was lucky to never have guests over, because the room was a total 'artistic mess', like he preferred to call it. Or at least he had thought about telling that to anyone who might visit him in the nearby future.

The puppet was found on the floor along with his natural-colors palette. He was humming as he mixed the colors, until he recognized the song stuck in his head; the same one that had been playing in the bar when he first laid his eyes on Deidara.

Sasori clenched his teeth. How was one blonde whore enough to make him go this insane when he had fucked countless people before? Hell, he had even tried to love people before, thinking it was for his own good, but he had never felt anything before meeting Deidara.

And now that he had, he regretted the night before, when he had decided to go to that bar to get drunk and have his 'Semi-rare Friday night fun'. Had he not, they would've probably never met (unless true love and fate and destiny existed, but most likely not), and then Sasori wouldn't be acting like a school girl with a major crush on the cutest guy at school right now.

He officially lost it when he noticed how he had been subconsciously mixing the perfect color for his latest partner's golden blonde hair. Sasori threw the palette away, not caring even if it ended up breaking the window or messing up the bed even further.

He heard a whistling sound and turned to face the source of the voice. "Someone shouldn't have gotten out of the bed at all today, it seems…"

Sasori hissed at the orange-haired male who had piercings all over his face. "It's none of your fucking business, Pein! Why are you even here?"

"Backdoor, Sasori, backdoor. Do learn to lock it for your own good."

"I didn't ask about the how, I asked about the why!" Sasori screeched.

"Doing a favor for a friend, just checking what you were up to last night…"

He growled irritably, already considering hurling a plate or a glass at him. Anything to get rid of him, hopefully for good. "You're not my fucking mother!"

"Let me make this easier for you," Pain sighed, "Does the name 'Deidara' ring a bell?"

Sasori stopped his frantical search for something to throw. "….what?"

"Thanks for confirming that for me… I'll be on my way, then." Pein muttered, satisfied with the info he had gathered.

"I hate you, Deidara-whatever. I seriously hate you," Sasori growled as Pein left. With this, he went back to bed.

The blonde didn't probably even remember him anymore. Sasori must've been just a fuck (maybe a good one) among other fucks like he was supposed to be.

Soon enough, a chick walked inside his room. One of the more dull-looking ones, she had boring short-ish pink hair and red clothes.

"Hello, pretty~" Deidara purred lazily. He really didn't feel like doing this, not right now, but he needed some money to pay for next week's meals.

"Hi..." the girl said awkwardly, "Deidara?"

"The one and only, un~ And what's your name?"

"I'm Sakura," she whispered, probably meant to sound seductive, but actually sounding very... Stupid. As she sat down on the bed, motioning for him to come closer, Deidara couldn't help thinking that his Danna could've done that much better.

Despite his wandering thoughts, Deidara sat on the bed next to her, moving awkwardly from the activities the night before still. _'Did he have to fuck me so hard, un? I bet he just wanted me to remember... Bastard.'_ he thought, spacing out.

"Umm, hello? I'm like, here?"

But then again, Sasori could've gone much rougher on him. Much, much rougher. He even bothered to prepare Deidara... To touch him. And that was saying a lot, mind you.

"Deidara?" Sakura pressed her hand on the spot between his thighs, looking for a reaction.

And a reaction she got.

"A-ah... Sasori..." Deidara moaned.

The girl stood up. "Excuse me?"

Deidara's mind, though foggy from sudden pleasure, understood that this was _bad_. A mistake could get you fired fairly easily, and Deidara was still sort of new and this was a _bad mistake_... It was a mistake he was never supposed to do, no matter how drunk, hammered or how _in love _he was. "I-I-I'm sorry, un..."

"Sorry doesn't cover it! You moaned out some other bitch's name! I'll make sure you get fired for this!" with this, she stomped off, obviously headed to make her threat happen.

Deidara groaned, packing his few things, knowing he'd be thrown out in a few moments, tops.

Soon enough, Hidan was at his door. "Dei..."

"I know, I know," Deidara muttered neglectedly, throwing his bag over his shoulder and taking a few hesitant steps outside. Hidan pressed something in his hand. "I'm fucking sorry this had to happen, buddy. Call me up if you need anything, okay?"

Deidara nodded, smiling to him warily. "Thanks. I will... Bye Hidan."

"See ya around."

He walked away awkwardly, too sore to really walk properly but too hurt to really care. He remembered that Hidan had given him something and looked at it.

An envelope.

He set the bag on the ground to open it, curious to see what Hidan had to say.

_'Hi brat!_

_Sasori lives at St. Oak's Street 74. It's pretty close to the bar you met him in. The back door should be open; he always leaves it that way. You fucking better get it on with him, 'cause I can see that you're serious._

_~Hidan_

_PS. Pein said that Sasori's been having a little bit of a breakdown today. Careful._  
><em>PPS. Pay me back later. No hurry.'<em>

There was also some money. A hundred and twenty, Deidara counted. He had no idea what Hidan had gone through to whip up such amount of cash when he always struggled to pay for the meals and such.

Deidara swore to himself to pay him back as soon as he possibly could.

"St. Oak's Street..." he muttered, trying to remember what Sasori's place had looked like.

He blushed lightly when he found the place, seeing by the size of the yard that the neighbors had definitely heard him _scream_ the night before.

He sneaked inside through the back door, and found the place a _mess_. Yes, everything was probably where it was supposed to be, but there was a heavy layer of dust anywhere, suggesting that Sasori either didn't care in the slightest or just couldn't be bothered to care.

Deidara could see the whole place from where was standing, excluding the bedroom. He decided that Sasori might be there and sneaked inside.

Sasori was curled up on the bed, a pillow hugged tightly to his chest. The covers were kicked on the floor as the red head slept peacefully.

Quietly, Deidara walked up to him. Because no matter how cute he looked (and Sasori looked_ really _cute right now), it would be wrong to just stand there and stare like some weird pervert (though considering their ages, or their age difference, more specifically, Sasori was the pervert and not him).

"Danna, un?" he asked, brushing his fingers to his cheek.

"Deidara..." Sasori moaned, and for a minute Deidara thought he was awake. Until he continued. "Why did you have to be _a whore_? I wanted you..."

Deidara slapped him.

Sasori recoiled, then sitting up. "What the..." he growled, then tilting his head, "Deidara."

"Morning." Deidara rolled his eyes, thinking that it was pretty bad if he could actually sleep in that long.

"...Deidara..."

"Yes..."

"...why aren't you disappearing?"

"Because you fucked me so hard that I can't just walk away right now. Sorry."

"But I thought this was a dream?" Deidara slapped him again, hissing slightly. "Okay, I'm awake now... Wait, no I'm not."

The blonde shook his head inridiculously. "You're impossible." He leant to kiss the other, sitting on his lap and straddling him.

Sasori pulled away first, after a few lingering seconds. "What the fuck are you doing in my house?"

He grimaced, realizing that the red head was finally awake enough to notice that kind of important detail he would've preferred to dance around a little longer. "Got fired and thrown out, okay?"

"What did you do to deserve that?"

Deidara blushed lightly, "There was this bitch and..." he looked down awkwardly. "She did something and... Imoanedoutyourname, un."

"What?" Sasori asked teasingly, seeming to enjoy the idea of this.

"I fucking moaned 'A-ah... Sasori...' Okay? And she got me fired for that, un. So I figured, it's all your fault for being so good so I'm here. Hidan told me that the back door would be open."

"Remind me to thank him someday..." Sasori purred, his hands making their way to Deidara's ass, giving it a light squeeze.

"I-I-I owe him one too!" Deidara squeaked, smiling slightly. "I really do, un!"

He laid his head on Deidara's shoulder. "Is it wrong if I'm kind of glad?"

"Yes. I'm homeless and almost broke. Not cool, un," Deidara sighed, annoyed that Sasori would find something good in his suffering.

"You're not homeless. You're here, aren't you?" Sasori chuckled, "And you're fucking mine now that you don't live and work in that place anymore. Hell yeah." Just the thought filled him with a weird sensation he couldn't be bothered to identify right then and there, for now dubbing it as 'happiness'.

"...Can I stay here, un? Really?" Deidara's eyes shone gleefully, "Really really?"

Sasori moved one hand to ruffle his hair. "Brat. Sure you can."

Deidara nuzzled his throat. "Is it too early for me to say that I love you, un?"

"We've known for..." Sasori did the math in his head, "Fourteen hours. Make it twenty-four and try that again."

"I could_ scream_ it for you if you wanted, un," Deidara murmured, lust fogging his sky blue eyes.

"Tempting." Sasori grinned at his lover, thinking about how the blonde had more to him than just the pretty outside he had at first fallen for. Sasori would definitely be pleased to hear him scream out his love, and made a mental note for himself to make the blonde do just this. "Ten more hours, then..."

"We don't really have to wait that long, you know…." Deidara suggested, wrapping his feet around Sasori's waist, grinding against him.

Sasori moaned in agreement, "...Fair enough. I've been deprived of you too long, anyways."

"…Some nine hours, un?"

They both laughed.

* * *

><p>...hope that wasn't too brain-damaging. Now go ahead and review.<p>

Why?

So that I won't have to write another story in this fandom in case you totally hated this. :D


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